This was supposed to be MY year.

This past year was supposed to be about me. (I realize the delusion in that sentence, considering I have 2 teenage sons at home.) However, I really wanted to focus on things I wanted to do and I really wanted to meet my weight loss and fitness goals before my next birthday. Well, my birthday is in a month and I am not going to make it. Don't get me wrong, there have been improvements in both diet and exercise, but I am not where I wanted to be and sometimes I don't think I will EVER get there. The year started off with lots of progress, but I stalled out around the end of May and I never really got my mojo back. I continued to eat well, but I lost the motivation to exercise with gusto. So of course, my gut reaction, knowing my birthday is a month away, is to go in to panic mode. I don't really need to eat do I? (Who am I kidding?!) And if I worked out Biggest Loser style for a month, I might at least get close to my goals. But, NO. I am going to fight my gut (literally and figuratively) and continue on at my VERY slow and steady pace. After all, I want to do it right and I want to do it permanently. I have managed to make a life change with my diet by becoming a vegan and sticking with it for a year (small exceptions on our trip when I had dairy and some bites of seafood). I know I will never go back to a traditional diet. I feel better eating as a vegan and that is good enough for me. Now, if only I could conquer the exercise part of it. The gym is too rich for my blood right now, so I've been looking for things to do that I can do anywhere and without equipment. Logically, that would be things like squats, push-ups, sit-ups, dips, etc. And I should be able to get some cardio in with some runs and bike rides. So simple.

NOT.

It is soooooooo easy to get distracted or be called away when I'm at home. At least at the gym it was an out of sight out of mind situation for the boys. Not so much at home. I need a plan of attack to make it happen. I don't think there is anything I want more than to meet my goals and know that I was able to do it.

After a quick google I found a plan. A 6 week schedule to 200 squats, 200 sit-ups, 100 push-ups and 150 dips. I took the initial test for each one and I didn't suck nearly as much as I thought I was going to! Yay me!

The reps have been put on the calendar and I have an actual plan. I will add in 3 runs a week and reassess in 6 weeks. That will be after my birthday, but oh well. Small victories. I will still be at least 20lbs lighter than my last birthday and 55 lbs lighter than when I started almost 2 years ago (or is it longer than that? I've lost track.). At least I am still going in the right direction.

Yes, this was supposed to by MY year. In some ways it was. I learned to box. I became a vegan. I took the boys on a once in a lifetime kind of trip. I bought a car. I adopted us a beautiful new dog. I got the majority of my house cleaned out and pared WAY down (one room to go!). I paid off debt.

It's good to take stock of the positives - it helps me distance myself from the negatives (and there are plenty). It's almost time to reassess my goals and make new ones for my next year. And in the midst of all the hard stuff that is surrounding me at the moment, that is something I can look forward to.